Miss Fortune

One day at work several months ago there were several of us sitting around a table eating Chinese takeout for lunch.  As we were finishing up our Kung Pao Chicken and Beef & Broccoli Stir-Fry, Angie suggested we all read out loud what was written on the little piece of paper inside of our respective fortune cookies.  With one slight modification: Add the words ‘in bed’ at the end. 

Talk about the perfect icebreaker!  It was almost unfortunate it came at the end of the meal, as it may have set the stage for one of the most interesting and entertaining meals since the days of Henry VIII.

To illustrate my point, I took the liberty of dining at 14 of the Chinese restaurants within 10 miles of my house.  (I’ll do pretty much anything in the name of journalism.)  Following are the 14 fortunes bestowed upon me.  Do yourself a favor and read these silently to yourself while adding Angie’s two words at the end:

·      Your everlasting patience will be rewarded sooner or later. 

·      Be mischievous and you will not be lonesome. 

·      The time is right to make new friends.

·      If your desires are not extravagant they will be granted.

·      You will have a very pleasant experience.

·      When in doubt, let your instincts guide you.

·      You are talented in many ways.

·      Grand adventures await those who are willing to turn the corner.

·      Decide what you want and go for it.

·      The first step to better times is to imagine them.

·      A thrilling time is in your immediate future.

·      Love always and deeply.

·      You will be invited to an exciting event.

·      Flattery will go far tonight.

After collecting these over a period of—oh, two weeks or so I shared them with Cindy when she got home one night hoping she would read them per Angie’s instructions, thus setting the stage for us to share a little R & R later in the evening.

As fate would have it Cindy and her coworkers had gone out for lunch that particular day to, of all places, a Chinese restaurant.  She showed me the fortune she had gotten several hours earlier:

·      The world may be your oyster, but it doesn’t mean you’ll get its pearl.